It's harder than you think...

So, recently I went on a series of auditions to be the host for the Discovery channel's new show "Wasted" about renovating homes into "greener" versions. I really wish their show was just about getting wasted, because I think I would've done much better. I love my Mother Earth and all, but I'm no tree-hugging hippy. Anyhoo, they had me do some weird things like go through garbage and tell people what they could've recycled or not used at all. Their direction to me after a few takes was, "Be like Louis C.K.!" "No, we need more Denis Leary!" I'm like, "What the F? You want me to fire one up and start telling these people they can shove their plastic bottles of water up their diamond-tight ass-holes?" I mean, it was just so bizarre! 'Hey, Actress, we want you for our show! Can you lob banana peels and batteries at these total strangers, and make sure you tell them how to properly dispose of type 2 plastics!!!!!!!!!' Whatever, Discovery Channel. Then it dawned on me (like a CFL lightbulb) Hosting is a lot harder than it looks! We watch all these retarded reality shows/make-over shows and see these well turned hosts never skip a beat. And then it dawned on me some more. I think everything is harder than you think and I'm going to go through life just saying that about every new thing I try, so I won't look like such a failing ass-hole. "Oh, going grocery shopping? That is a lot harder than you think! You have to get a caaarrrrttt. Then you have to pick out stuff on shelvessss and then you have to pay. It's really tough. I know! You wouldn't think so, but it is." Or, "Actually, getting cash out of an ATM isn't as easy as it looks, folks. There is a vertiable montage of things that could go wrong." And, "If I can just accomplish returning this video back to Blockbuster, then I know the hardest part of my day is over."